lukeWARM!!!!!!!!!

if there is anything to learn over the past two weeks, it's that hype can backfire like a motherfucker. the internetz was all a-buzzin' over the Bjork/Timbaland collab and most people were saying this duo would ruin the world. unfortunately, it was nothing but some spastic nonsense because the song Earth Intruders sucks so bad that i would rather chew on broken glass sprinkled with poison than listen to it. the beat isn't that fresh, bjork is doing the same shit over and over again, and i'm pretty sure half of her vocals are looped enough to drive any sane person crazy.

the other piece of shit everyone was talking about is the song Umbrella with Jay-Z and Rhianna. i wasn't expecting mozart but i was at least expecting something worth dancing to. this song sounds more phoned in than Miss Cleo's accent. Rhianna throws in some half-assed jamacian moans and calls it a day, while Jay-Z does the same thing he's always done which is rap about bitches, hoes, cars and love. why didn't someone stop this???

i don't get it. two hot collaborations, zero hot songs. at this rate, i could do a better job "collaborating" with an alley cat and an empty garbage can. i HATE YOU, MUSIC!

(thnx to dirty harry & said the gramophone)